“Listen to another story. Once a nun wrote to me to say that she was ill and would die if she didn’t have an operation. I wrote to her saying exactly the opposite. She wrote back saying that the doctor told her that she would die in so many days if she didn’t have an operation. I repeated my request, “Have faith; leave it all to God; prefer death .”
Later she sent me her response saying that the illness went away.
Do you see? I have experienced this thousand of times. When you put death before you and await it at every moment, it flees far away from you. When you fear death, it constantly pursues you.
I buried three people with tuberculosis, nourishing the hope that I would catch it. After I undressed the corpse, I wore his clothes, but death fled away from me to those who fear it. I have been ill my whole life. I have never had any treatment. I absolutely eat the wrong foods. But death is nowhere in sight.
What I am trying to say is that without the will of the Lord, we neither get sick nor die. Therefore, far away from us. O lack of faith!”
-Saint Joseph the Hesychast
Monastic Wisdom
Thirtieth Letter
ORTHODOX CHRISTIAN FAITH AND LIFE 
Having come close to death early last year (2019), I no longer fear death; I didn’t particularly fear death even then when I was so close to the end; I believe that God gave me grace to withstand the enemie’s attempts to make me fear death. I spent my days in the hospital evangelizing everyone that came near; every nurse, doctor, visitor and the person on the other side of the curtain dividing the room heard about Jesus Christ and Him crucified. For many nights I couldn’t sleep at all and I rested in the Lord all night long, the nights became a vigil in Christ for me as repeated all night long, “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me a sinner.” Interestingly, among all of the nurses, I had one Russian Orthodox nurse, one Armenian Orthodox nurse, and one very devout Roman Catholic nurse; I was in good hands and when they entered the room they would venerate the large icon of the Theotokos that was in front of the TV screen.
Being a spiritual child of the Elder Joseph because of my residence and constant attendance (about 18 years) at Divine Liturgies by living close to one of Geronda Ephraims’s monasteries here in the USA (Monastery of the Theotokos – The Life-Giving Spring) I am privileged to live a little longer before death in a perfect environment. As Elder Joseph states, “without the will of the Lord, we neither get sick nor die;” we live in Him, dead or alive and accepting everything that happens to us, seemingly good or bad (in our estimation) as being the Will of God for us.
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\\o// LORD have mercy on us ……. COVID’19
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Glory to God!
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trying to get sick on purpose is hardly God’s will for us.
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