Or, my last day at Metamorfosi monastery of Saint John the Forerunner and how Gerondas Gregorios and Mother Akylina defeated the demons’ assaults and saved my father from eternal death.

The night before my departure, I had the blessing to speak to Mother Akylina. (So far all my momentous meetings at the monasteries have mysteriously taken place the last few hours before my departure…) Mother Akylina is a very old and frail sister in her nineties, bent in two, with a very sharp, illumined nous, and with beautiful, wide azure eyes staring into eternity. Until last summer, Mother Akylina was probably the first person pilgrims met upon entering the monastery, near its book store, but recently this sister has completely “disappeared” in hesychia and is now rarely seen anywhere. Yet God in His Mercy granted an exception to me.

“The just shall flourish like the palm tree, shall grow like a cedar of Lebanon.
Planted in the house of the Lord, they shall flourish in the courts of our God.
They shall bear fruit even in old age, always vigorous and sturdy,
As they proclaim: “The Lord is just; our rock, in whom there is no wrong.”
(Psalm 92:13-16)

I always smile when I think of Mother Akylina because although she is old and bent double, she is “always vigorous and sturdy“, moves like a firefly, and her knowledge and eagerness to help sweeps you up in her enthusiasm. Indeed, she “bears fruit even in old age”.

I always listen to Mother Akylina. I feel most indebted to her because she saved my father from eternal death. Together with Gerondas Gregorios of blessed memory. It was their discernment, leading to insight, and ultimately to foresight, which wrought that amazing miracle at the end of my father’s life. Oh, what a profoundly moving experience I experienced with their prayers! Let me try to put it into words, if I can.

My father was a very good person and a conscientious doctor who honoured his calling, offered wise counselling about diet and exercise to everybody, cared deeply for his patients and helped them as much as he could. I always smile when I remember his words to his patients and us, to be sure, family and friends: “No, you do not need any medication. You should just lose weight, exercise regularly, and your test results will improve”. Or: “No, you do not need any make-up; eat lots of fruits and veggies, and their nutrient antioxidants, vitamins and minerals will help you get glowing skin”. Or: “Feeling stressed? Having difficulty to sleep at night? No need for any medication. Just run or walk briskly for at least one hour every day, take a cold shower at the end of your training, and then come and tell me if you still feel stressed. And if this ‘dosage’ fails, repeat as often as you can, as many times in the day! ” Or: “Never take a serious decision at night! Rest, get some sound sleep, think about it clearly and calmly, and then make up your mind in the cold light of day”. And so on and so forth …

But it was not just his words and the example he set, being himself an athlete and a tennis champion. My father, God rest his soul, also had integrity, courage, resilience, cheerfulness, empathy, respect, compassion and kindness towards everybody. Each and everyone loved my father and wanted to be near him. His only difficulty was … to believe in afterlife. After retirement, he started diligently to study the Holy Bible, day after day, the whole Old and New Testament, intrigued by my life choices, underlying the passages which made the greatest impression of him. I have kept his study Bible and am still impressed by how much he had read. Years went by like this, but my father never quite made up his mind to participate in any church sacraments, especially confession to a priest.

Then, towards the end of his life, he became a patient himself who needed doctors, as he started having some horrible nightmares of ghastly dark figures chasing and attacking him. Every night, he would fall from his bed and end up on the floor ‘beaten’, injured and shivering. All his friend doctors considered these symptoms side-effects of the medication he was taking, but they could not help him, free him from that torture, night after night.

“We can ignore even pleasure. But pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

Once, back in those days, I went to St. John the Forerunner monastery and met sister Akylina as usual at the bookstore, and she asked me about our family news. When she heard this update from my father, she looked very concerned, sharply told me to “wait here” and disappeared in a haste to meet Gerondas Gregorios. At that time, Gerondas was in absolute silent seclusion, but she was one of the very few sisters who had the blessing to “interrupt” his hesychia at her discretion.

A few minutes later, she came back in a hurry and told me Gerondas’ message to my father: “Ioanni, if you do not confess to a priest, these dark figures that chase you in your nightmares, they will chase you in reality after you die, because they are demons”.

–“But Mother, how can I say such things to my father? I do not dare. He will dismiss them. He is a doctor, he has witnessed lots of deaths at his long medical career in hospitals, he does not believe in the possibility of life after death”.

–“We insist. You should say Gerondas’ message to your father. We will all pray”.

And so, a few days later, I summoned all my courage and told my father Gerondas’ words. To my surprise, he did not dismiss them but looked at me very seriously in the eyes. He told me he needed time to reflect about all this. I am sure that this martyrdom must have been a most humbling experience for my father, who had survived all life’s odds, war, poverty, even losing his father as a young child and having to support his brethren and his young, widow mother, yet was now helpless. What a humbling experience for someone so strong to feel so powerless and helpless! We all started praying and waited … God must have been shouting in my father’s nightmares: it was indeed his megaphone to rouse his skeptic child. “Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here; see my hands. Reach out your hand and put it into my side. Stop doubting and believe.” (John 20:27) Another megaphone was certainly + Gerondas Gregorios’ stern warning to him.

A few months passed by, and one day, my father called me and asked me to arrange for a priest to come to hear his Confession! (By that time he could not move outside the house). As you may very well guess, I promptly arranged this with our parish priest. By God’s Providence, I was also present at his Confession. My father was a simple man and wanted to make his confession in front of us (ie. my mother and I), and eventually the priest, after hearing his Confession, covered the heads of all three of us with his epitrachelion and read the absolution prayer to us all.

From that night on, after his Confession and Holy Communion, my father’s nightmares disappeared at once and his martyrdom came to an end. He radiated peace and joy! Very soon, his health sharply declined. But there was no pain, agony or anguish in any of this. Only peace and joy! In a matter of a few weeks, my father slept peacefully in the Lord, who patiently extended the life of His child just as much as needed to save him. Glory to God! Christ is Risen!

Mother Akylina’s prayers are so powerful and targeted! So are her insights. You probably understand now why I pay such close attention to every single word she is telling me. So, I did yesterday, and I paid even more attention now because she looked “bodiless”— as if her departure to Heavens was imminent. Please forgive me for not being able to share her words since they are all about most private matters. But I can share this. It is about somebody who had just started going to Church, Confession etc and he kept telling me how his life had become so much harder since. Her words were that all this is from the Evil one to discourage him and he should not pay any attention to his suggestions. It will become harder because of the spiritual battle, but he should keep his soul in hell and despair not. And when I told her, that I cannot say anything to this person about anything really, she told me “then, pray!” Also, about a very difficult situation, a Cross, her words were: “As the Lord provides. May it be blessed. Therefore, keep silence and pray!“

St. John Climacus, The Ladder of Divine Ascent

“Discernment in beginners is true knowledge of themselves; in intermediate souls it is a spiritual sense that faultlessly distinguishes what is truly good from what is of nature and opposed to it; and in the perfect it is the knowledge which they possess by divine illumination, and which can enlighten with its lamp what is dark in other. Or perhaps, generally speaking, discernment is, and is recognised as, the assured understanding of the divine will on all occasions, in every place and in all matter; and it is only found in those who are pure in heart, and in body, and in mouth.

The body is enlightened by its two corporeal eyes; but in visible and spiritual discernment the eyes of the heart are illumined”.

St. John of Kronstadt, My Life in Christ

“The heart is the eye of the human being. The purer it is. the quicker, farther, and clesarer it can see.”